‘This could be our year’
This was the feeling at the Convocation troops mustered for some pre-flight relaxation in the Escape lounge at Manchester Airport. A trouble-free journey and a few beers later, by the time we gathered in the traditional Haxenhaus venue on Friday night, the optimism was growing exponentially as the beer flowed. There we toasted the good health of our Polish adversaries for the next day and of some of our old friends from Cologne. Michael Kersch again did a great job providing beer 'bons' courtesy of Willi the owner who, due to a recent heart scare, has been given other duties on this auspicious evening, and the absence of Daniel Codello, known affectionately as 'Napoleon' and Scouse Mickey, both from Esch, was sadly noted.
The six-country tournament assembles teams from various cities that are twinned with Cologne. Liverpool has the distinction of being the first of these, having become a Partnerstadt as early as 1952 – Liverpool’s willingness to twin with Cologne so soon after the war was deeply appreciated by the Cologne people. Under the new format to accommodate the expansion of the tournament to six teams, Liverpool, Cologne and Katowice had been drawn in the ‘group of death’, whereas Esch, Lille and Thessaloniki were apparently in the group of going to bed early without any alcohol, denoting perhaps more a death of the soul...
The day of the tournament dawned and, unsurprisingly perhaps the conviction that this would be our year had been dented slightly by the after-effects of the Haxenhaus etc. The usually robust Jonny Welsh confessed himself fragile (and volatile!) and others were in a similar state. Worse was to come with the shock revelation that the usually staunch John Littler had not brought his boots with him and was not intending to play.
A period of intense discussion followed, during which it was pointed out that: the reputational damage of his chosen course would be irreparable; he was letting the side down; Roger would never forgive him. Eventually, the force of this moral suasion proved too much for Littler, who agreed to play – but only in Ben’s trainers, as he didn’t want to damage his own ‘dress trainers’, a novel concept to most of us.
So, having got all that out of the way, we lined up for the first group game against Katowice as follows: Alex in goal, back for (l to r) Willie, Littler, Two Dogs, Mike (E), midfield (l to r) Simon, Roger, Jonnie, Mike (K), up front Anthony and Chris. Topper making up the quality on the bench.
From the first whistle, Convocation bossed this game. Jonny and Roger, together known as the Northern Powerhouse were energetic and mobile in the centre of midfield, Mike and Simon on either flank were pressing forward, Anthony was drifting into space and looking to play off McNally, the ‘spearhead’ of the attack.
In defence, all the earlier nonsense forgotten, Littler soon reverted to type and despite not having played fore some years, was marshalling the defence in his own inimitable way. ‘Deep and narrow’ was the motto and in truth the Poles rarely got anywhere near our goal.. In fact, they only made a single noteworthy chance, when Willie (who had not played for an estimated 20 years) was caught upfield, and Littler was beaten for pace down the right. The resultant cross was scuffed wide, but in his hot pursuit of the Polish forward, John suffered a thigh injury that would eventually curtail his participation in the tournament.
At the other end, Convocation were making chances, half-chances, but did not have the rub of the green. One audacious volley from Anthony was heading for the top corner when the Polish goalkeeper appeared, airborne from nowhere, to tip the ball over the bar. At other times the opportunities that came and went in the Polish goalmouth brought back memories to your correspondent of Jan Tomaszewski in 1973. For the benefit of those (most of the team) who weren’t born then.
Other memories of World Cups past were evoked by Mike Kent’s various impressions of Scotland’s Archie Gemmill (the ‘demented clockwork mouse’). Mike twisted and turned and then twisted again but unlike Gemmill vs. Holland in 1978 no goal ensued.
All in all, a more than creditable performance in all the circumstances, but the game ended 0-0 our failure to get on the scoresheet would have consequences, as we shall see.
After a few minutes rest, we faced Cologne, who had been beaten 2-0 by Katowice in their first group game. During this game, McNally took time off from his familiar impersonation of a centre forward to provide one of the comedic moments of a weekend that was not short of hilarity, when he went down like a sack of spuds having received the ball firmly in his solar plexus. With Chris winded, his teammates played on, perhaps sensing that the chances of scoring a goal had suddenly risen, until the killjoy Germans prevailed upon the ref to stop the game.
As in the first game, all the pressure was coming from the Convo, but goals were equally difficult to come by. The German goalkeeper was having the game of his life, and saved brilliantly from Topping, another who had not played during the several years since his knee gave up and who had come on for the now definitively injured Littler. This in turn required the overdue withdrawal of McNally to the back four, which in reality was now a back three, as we pressed for the two goals that would restore parity with the Poles’ goal difference and the three that would see us into the final.
Eventually the pressure told and a cross from the right was met crisply by Will for his first goal in two decades, and first ever in Europe. One-nil and all to play for. Convocation were getting forward at every opportunity now and came agonisingly close on a number of occasions. We nearly came unstock when Max Dressigacker was one-on-one with goalkeeper Hendry who stood up well to smother the danger. A few final assaults on the Cologne goal proved fruitless and Convocation were heading for the third-place play-off.
Our opponents in this game were Esch from Luxemburg – sadly minus the aforementioned ‘Scouse Mick’, so named because of the accent he developed during a year living in Kenny, and one of the few Luxembourgeois willing to partake of a pre-match drink.
This game followed a very similar pattern to the previous two. Convocation on top pretty much throughout. The defence impregnable, the midfield industrious and the attack unable to force the ball into he goal. Perhaps the best chance of this encounter fell to Simon Williams, who cut in incisively from the left, found himself in a time warp inside the opponents’ penalty area and… blazed over. Shortly after it was all over and it was determined that the third place was to be decided by a penalty shoot-out.
First pen for Convocation was taken by McNally. The alleged centre forward finally ended his barren spell with a cheeky one down the centre and along the ground that eluded the diving keeper. Esch promptly equalised and Anthony was up next. “Don’t change yer mind Anthony” was the unanimous advice. However… second thoughts during the run-up saw the ball fly high and wide. Esch scored again – their penalties beginning to resemble those dispatched by the ruthlessly efficient Germans at Italia ’90, to draw yet another World Cup analogy. Third for Convocation was Mike Kent, who took a half-way decent kick, but fatally it was at a nice height for the keeper, as the TV pundits would have it. Esch scored again and it was all over.
We had failed to concede in open play over three games (surely a Convo first?) and ended up in fourth place. The tournament was won by the team from Lille who had travelled down on the day and were unencumbered by the effects of the demon drink. Curiously, they serenaded everyone with a rendition of “Allez le Bleus” despite them wearing an all-white strip. Mike Kent proudly accepted the fourth place trophy from one of the assembled dignitaries.
For a flavour of the proceedings during remainder of the day and night, your correspondent invites you to view the accompanying photographs. The only other incident of note took place the next morning, when roomies Ben and Mike were slightly taken aback when the frosted glass door of their bathroom exploded after minimal contact from Ben (albeit he is the hardest man in Convocation).
In conclusion, one more excellent trip to Cologne, made all the more enjoyable for the tremendously creditable efforts expended by all on and off the pitch and of course our hosts’ customary hospitality.
